It's been a rough 2 days. It's that "female time" of the month when everything that is terrible for me sounds amazing, my cramps are so bad that I just want to sleep all day and I am bloated and miserable. But, instead of going running after work yesterday, I let myself make excuses. I was too tired, cramping too bad, it might rain, etc. You know, all the same excuses that we give to ourselves all the time to get out of things...
Last night I went to bed thinking "in the morning, I'm getting up when my alarm goes off and I'm going running." Well, this morning rolled around and I was once again too tired, cramping too bad, etc. I let myself make excuses again. I was thinking about this while I was in the shower, why do I keep letting myself make these excuses? I know that exercise helps with menstrual cramps, so why didn't I just go run? I'll tell you why. Because I have two little voices in my head. Now, I'm really not crazy and you don't need to check me into the loony bin just yet. Hear me out on this one.
I have the voice of the girl I've been for the past 6-7 years. The one who would rather eat chips and burgers than salad and veggies. The one who would rather lay on the couch all day than go for a run. The one who was miserable with her weight, the way her body looked and her attitude about herself.
Then there's the voice of the athlete inside of me. The one who pushed me to start this journey, the one who speaks up on the days that I actually get my workouts in and eat right, the one who has lost 25 pounds and 5 pant sizes since March, the one who is happier now with her body than she has been in 6-7 years.
Now these voices fight, a lot. They go back and forth on what I should eat, whether or not I should go running, mainly health and fitness related things but sometimes other little things as well.
What happened last night and this morning both is that the first little voice was stronger than the second. The second little voice didn't try to talk the first voice out of the excuses. Who's fault is that?
MINE.
It's as simple as that, it's my fault that the first voice is the stronger influence on my life. She has been the stronger inner voice for so many years that it's hard to shut her up.
So, it's time to retrain those inner voices. I have to get to a point where that second inner voice is louder than the first. She needs to be the stronger influence in my life because she will help me reach my goals and be Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger.
Until next time,
Meagan
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